Quarantine: Day 1

You know, going into this previous week, us public school employees were highly concerned about managing the superhuman behaviors that were going to escalate as a result of day light savings, a full moon, and Friday the 13th all within a 6 day time period. Putting all snot dodging, table licking, and dirty tissues aside, these events were really making for an interesting week. If those weren’t enough turn of events, Friday afternoon we were told to pack up our personal belongings, as our school would be completely shut down for two weeks due to the Coronavirus frenzy. The first thought running through my head was “have you seen some of these kiddos on a normal day?” I honestly often contemplate wearing a mask on a good day. As a frantic group of teachers, we had more questions than administration had answers. Will we have to teach remotely? Will we continue to get paid? Will we have to make these days up? Will there be enough toilet paper to go around? Their response.. “We don’t know”. Well shit, thats reassuring – as i’m smuggling toilet paper from the woman’s bathroom out in my oversized therapy bag..

As most of the world has gone completely nuts, I wanted to bring my loyal readers along for my 14 day quarantine “vacation” as some non-educators may see it. Hunny – if this was a vacation, I most certainly would not be on my hands and knees, hand scrubbing that part of the toilet that everyone pretends isn’t there, covered in dirty hair and old piss splatter – surely this isn’t your idea of a vacation. I mean, I have basically been given the gift of time, although that time may be spent checking things off of a very long list I no longer have an excuse not to do – lucky me.

So far, my dog has been super appreciative. She has enjoyed sleeping in – taking up 3/4ths of the bed, and mid-morning spurts of energy destroying any toy that may ruin the mood – she is definitely here for a good time. As for myself, my ambitions may have been a little high compared to my actual motivation level.. How many of us might react when given the blessed gift of “social distancing” – obviously creating an outrageous list broken down by room, task, and level of disgust. Let’s just say, day 1 has come to an end and the mess has held its own – it’s not ready to go. It wasn’t prepared for this pandemic, and I needed to respect that.

So what did I do on day one of quarantine? I absolutely got some much needed rest, pissing my off my internal alarm by snoozing for at least an extra hour – going back to work is going to be a nightmare. I spent some quality time with my angel dog, as we snuggled up on the couch watching the dumbest reality TV show I could find from beginning to end within a 12 hour time period. Don’t forget the 3 cups of amazingly over priced coffee I sipped in peace without a 6 year-old child that’s not even mine mispronouncing my last name 10 times before 9 AM. I will say, the dishwasher ran, and a quality dinner was made, but I completely took the much needed mental health day that has been a long time coming.

Looking forward to the days to come, as we may be in stuck in the house for Lord only knows how long – I am totally starting to regret not bringing my board games home from work. This would be the perfect occasion to show my Fiance who the real boss is, and totally bargain Spring cleaning tasks. But, as for now, I will try and keep my sanity by slowly completing my chores like a responsible adult, and making deep conversation with my dog until I can hangout with real human beings again. Until then, i’ll keep ya’ll posted.

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